Saturday, August 7, 2010

Why my online dating career is over..

I talked to this guy for a while.

We met online.

exchanged numbers.

He seemed cool.

Single dad.

Hard working.

Nice.

We planned to meet. Today. (as in Saturday.)

I took a shower.

Shaved my legs (not that I was planning anything.. ) but you know how much I hate to shave my legs.

Picked out an outfit

did my make up

straightened my hair.

An hour and half of prep time.

He picks me up.

Says I look nice.

Then nothing.

Silence.

We get to the restaurant.

Silence.

I talk.

Because I ALWAYS talk.

He doesn't.

I borrow a pen from the bar.

I try and play tick tack toe on a napkin.

Cats game

I try and play hang man.

He is not impressed.

Even less impressed when I hang man-ed _ _ _ _ _ _ _!

Whats that spell?

Awkward!

Hey, I though it was funny.

No laugh.

After thirty painful minutes he says: "I don't feel it."

Ya think?

I nicely said "I agree!" when I wanted to say "No shit, Sherlock!"

I tried to talk, until our food came.

He didn't.

I quit talking.

He ate.

I didn't.... NOT ONE BITE!

I asked for a box.

So did he.

Our check came.

I offered to pay.

He wouldn't let me.

We drove home.

Said goodbye.

Record for shortest date: 46 minutes!

It took me longer to get ready.

Epic fail.

Still single! :)

Anyone up for a game of hangman?

28 comments:

Kit Kat said...

You spelled Awkward for hangman??!!! You are my hero! That is awesome!
Brit you are so funny!

Rebekah said...

Oh my goodness! This had me laughing so hard. I'm sorry it was awkward but you can look back on this and laugh!

Iris Flavia said...

Soooo bad, what a waste of time that guy was - so sorry!!!

Anonymous said...

wow, how painfully obvious he was snoresville.

I guess it could be worse, right? He could've been infatuated with you and you not agree ... lol

Anonymous said...

Lol I'm sorry your date when that bad! It made me laugh though. Did he honestly think that would go anywhere if you did all the talking?? CHECK PLEASE!

Krysten @ Why Girls Are Weird said...

Holy wow! I've had some not so awesome dates but... wow!

Busy Bee Suz said...

You are so funny....thanks for sharing this with us.
I know there is the RIGHT guy out there for you, be patient. :)

Mandy@ a sorta fairytale said...

Holy jeez! So sorry that didn't work out, but so glad you realized it early on and got out of there! You WILL find a guy that you can laugh with and play tic tac toe on your napkin with... hang in there! He's out there! :-)

Renee said...

Just out of curiosity, I wonder what he would have been feeling? Or better yet, how does he know he's feeling something if he doesn't open his mouth? Lol.

Oh well, it seems for the best anyway. You're not meant to be with a lame-o.

Token Yankee said...

He sounds like a dream haha.

Nicole said...

OMG! I have sooo been there! lol dont give up! I found my bf/fiance online! =D

Hey Barbie said...

better luck next time!
he doesn't seem very exciting anyways...atleast you got a free meal out of it LOL

~Tom~ said...

I went on a date with a girl like that. It was hard work making it through the night. I never asked her out again after that.

molly said...

iafhbalkblviuskeblgi?!?! did he even TRY? what an idiot. WHAT AN IDIOT. i'm so sorry you had to endure those terrible 46 minutes :-(

molly said...

p.s. when you posting about the piggy cake??

Anonymous said...

Oh goodness. I'm starting my online dating journey, and this does not sound promising. I'm sorry you had such a terrible experience!

Brittany Nolan said...

arg! he sounds like a butthole!!!! at least you got a free meal out of it!! :))

Katie said...

Brittany,
I updated my music playlist on my blog page hahaha :) hope you like it since you said you listened to the whole thing the other morning!!! I listen to it getting ready in the morning, get me pumped for the day!

Katie said...

hahahah this made me laugh!!! wellllllllll he seemed pretty lame!!!!! sucks for him, onto the next one your pretty than that d-bag anyway!!!!
But funny story ;)

More Than Words said...

LOL about "awkward" for the hangman word!! That was a good one!

Well, at least the date didn't drag on for hours, and you got a free meal! :)

V said...

Damn, at least you got some great blog materia, because it was funny... and awkward even reading it. sorry it didnt work out hun. xoxo

AiringMyLaundry said...

I'd play Hangman with you!

Sorry it didn't go well.

Anonymous said...

haha, nice. And that sucks!!!

jules said...

That is so awkward!! I am so sorry. But pretty funny at the same time. I'm glad you just gave up and didn't even eat. What a jerk on his part too!

Shelley said...

That's hilarious that you were bored enough to do those little games and that you spelled out awkward!! Haha!! What a bad date!! Don't give up though. Not every guy would be that socially inept on a date!

Syndal said...

haha that's an amazing story. we've all been there. (i met my bf on match.com-and he was not the first date I had to go on through there!)

He & Me + 3 said...

OMgosh for real? That is just crazy. Atleast you were both honest and ended it quickly.

~Jesse~ said...

Easily the best date story I've heard in a long time :) I laugh every time I think about "awkward"