Saturday, May 31, 2008

Dear Little brother

Dear Little Brother,

Tonight you graduated. YOU DID IT! (finaly!!)
You are free to make your own choices, make your own successes, and yes.. your own failures. Truth is you're going to learn way more from the mistakes then you ever will from the success. Or rather, your mistakes might end up being or helping you to achieve the greatest success you'll ever achieve. I hope you know how proud of you I am. You have grown into the sweetest, funniest, kindest, and nicest young men I know. Truley.

You have always been my best friend. In the beginning it was because it was forced, we were home schooled ya know! (lol) When there is no one else around, you'll bond with anyone, just ask prisoners. So there we were, young, nieve, and friendless... so we chose eachother. I'd like to say we made excellent choices. I remember playing "junk yard" with all of our cars, doing "amy and the children" plays, rideing our bikes all over the neighborhood, and flooding the basement when we flushed our toilet paper "Casts" down the downstairs toilets.. Ya the "good old" days. Where your bottom was always sore, and your face always dirty. I think i'll always picture you in your KIX shirt with koolaid stains and a dirty face. (and dont forget the mullet)

Then we grew up a bit, and mom shipped us off to the "big" public school. We may not have stayed as close, but our kinship was still there. I was telling someone the other day that, you and I have unspoken connections. I dont know if i've ever said "i'm sorry" to you, unless forced to by mom. When we piss eachother off, we know to just let it be. If you storm away from me with a cuss word after I said or did something stupid.. I know not to follow you and apologize. I know to just let you be, and that a half hour later it'll be as if none of it ever happened. We know we love eachother, and we know that eachother is sorry and never INTENDED on hurting the other.. so we never have to say "were sorry". I know that may sound horrible to some people, but I guarantee if I died tomarrow, you'd know I loved you, and visa versa.
In the last few years our relationship has matured to something more then just playing cars, or makeing jokes. We've had "real" conversations, about things that are important and meaningful in our lives. Some of my favorite times with you, have been in the car. Driving and talking about the things going on in our lives. You've listened to me when my life has been apsolute hell, and we got through a lot of personal struggles together. I dont think I could have done it with out you.. or at least not with out your jokes. You have a gift of makeing me laugh, when all I really want to do is cry.
You are not only a gift to me, but also to my son. With out a father figure in his daily life it has been so important to me that you have stepped up. You play with him, discipline him, and are the strong male role model that he needs. It meant the world to me that you were there at his birth, the whole dramatic long process. I am so happy that you are his godfather, because I know that you share my beliefs in God and that you will share those beliefs with him. That is so important to me. I love how he lights up every time he see's you. I still cant believe that his first "real" word was "JJ", and that he knew that was you. (he didnt even say mama yet..grrr!) You two truley have a bond that is very strong. Thank you for being there for him, and for makeing him so happy. He really thinks the world of you.. and so do I.
So now is the hard part.. the goodbye. I wish all I had to do was say "see ya" as you drove a half hour to a state school where I could still see you on the weekends.. but thats not the case. When you drive away next month, it'll be months until I get to see you again. That is going to be a very hard day. I know that I will cry... and I know you said you wouldnt.. but just know that it is okay to cry.. Really. Jason.. you are such an important part of my life, and as much as it is going to kill me to see you go, I honestly think its for the best. I know that you are going to be so happy in Florida, and you are going to make something of yourself. I hope that everything turns out exactly as you have planned, and if it doesnt, pick your self up and move on. Lifes a bitch.. :) but you are an expert on bitches now, you've had your fair share of them.. you'll know what to do! :)
So now its the advice part.. right? Well here ya go advice from the big worldly sister of yours:

1) Beer before liquor never been sicker.

2) Liquor/drugs can lead to children.. (prime example:yours truley)



5) STUDY!!

6) PARTY :) (but not too much)

7) Dont forget about your family, they are your biggest asset!

8) Be true to yourself, with out being scared to make changes and grow!

9) Realize your potential.. you have amazing God given gifts and it'd be a shame if you wasted them.

10) Remember that not all women are as great as me.. so dont compare them to me.. or you'll really be let down.. I know lifes rough.. but hey I bet there are some that come pretty damn close.. :) (i'll check out this new one when I come to visit :) )

So little brother.. this is it (well not really you dont leave for three weeks) But I want you to know that I love you VERY VERY much... and I am super proud of you! I'm really goign to miss hanging out with you, and all of our laughs.. (tear) But just remember I'm only an airplane ride away and i'll be there if you ever need me... Thats a promise.
I love you my "big little brother" !


p.s. Every time you wear your Twins Jersey.. think of me and Aidyn :)