Monday, March 10, 2008

Sleepless nights, cuddles, and pink eye.

I know that most first blogs should be traditional, in the fact that I state that this is my first blog, and yada yada, shareing a little bit about me....but I suppose you'll get to know me little by little as you read my blogs. Not to mention that my life is a chaotic, and I need time to pour my crazy life out for all to read. Somehow its theraputic.

Yesterday, as I was driving home from working at group home #1 (I work at two..) enjoying my long forty minute drive (I drive slow on purpose...that and I got a ticket less then a month ago. stupid cop.) scanning the radio for some tune... soaking in the sun. Praying that spring will come faster, and snow will melt, and hateing that I had to set my clock an hour ahead the night before. Then I decided to call the ex. Yes, during my blissful relaxing car ride, that I usually use to call friends and family (that i tend to get along with), crank country music, sing off key, and take time to myself, I made the stupid decision to call my ex. Not just any ol' ex... my babys daddy. He then promptly told me that there was a quote unquote "bank error" and so child support was not put into my account. *sigh*. Not a big deal, had I not paid an extra large amount to try and get a inch closer to paying off one of my credit cards. So for 24 hours I freaked out about whether or not i'd have tons of over draft fees. yuck. I hate money. I hate babys daddys that dont call the day they find out that the money that was supposed to be in my account wasnt going to be there, and then somehow blames it on me, and most of all I hate that I ruined my theraputic car ride.

So then..... well then I got home and my beautiful blue eyed boy had two big pink puffs around his eyes. Nasty green goop on his eye lashes and in the corner of his eyes. Leading to my very fist encounter with pink eye. *sigh* i blame daycare. I couldnt get my hands on him fast enough. I just wanted to cuddle him and give him kisses. I felt so bad. Luckily he loves g-ma and g-pa as much as mommy.. (well almost ;) ) I then tried to call in some favors from my co-workers of group home #2 so I could stay home that night with my little man. Of course all that "you scratch there back, they'll scratch yours" crap my manager told me when they hired me was full of it. Cuz no body would work for me, and no body had a real good excuse. So an hour and a half later I was back out the door to work again. It always hurts my heart to leave my boy.

I got home around 9:10 after working in a chaotic group home by myself. Sick of bickering and drama. Ready for my relaxing "full size" bed. Ready for sleep. Sweet dreams.. filled with hot passionate love making with an exotic foreigner. That never happened either. *sigh* Instead my sweet little boy was still up. Usually spending time with him is my favorite part of the day. What isnt my favorite part of the day is my sweet little boy sick. He was so uncomfortable, and his poor little eyes were even more pink and goopy. We spent the next few hours up, watching childrens movies, and cuddling. Even though he was in pain and sick, he' was all to eager to watch baby einstein and dora. For the hundreth time. He eventually fell asleep... by this time.. I'M WIDE AWAKE! I watch 3/4 of a movie before passing out.

I was up several times through out the night, but all and all got more sleep then I thought I would. I rescheduled my in home patients for today, and me and my little man spent the entire day together. It was so nice having a day off. My baby's daddy called, after getting everything figured out. I called the bank. No bank errors. Everything worked out for the best. We even had a nice conversation, with friendly banter and chatting about the new things Aidyn has done. He seems genuinely interested, and excited to have him... I'm not ready to let him go again....

Tomorrow is off to work again, and luckily my scheduled shift is for the evening, so grandma can watch aidyn again. Back to chaos again. Even though my little man was sick today, it was still really nice spending time with him. Maybe we need to take a sick day every month. As long as there is no puke involved.